Bitten

Apparently there is a spider (or a band of spiders) living in my bed or somewhere near my bed and he/she is out to get me. This spider has been attacking me for the past few months. Never two days in a row, maybe not even twice in a week, but it manages to get me just as all my old bites heal up. I actually have a scar on one of my arms from one of the bites. Yeah, this spider is a tricky little devil that means business.

Also, this spider doesn’t like to bite once or twice in a night; it likes to get me at least 3-4 times. I don’t really know what to do. I’ve washed our sheets multiple times, I’ve swept underneath the bed, I bought a new mattress liner….what more can I do???

And here is the real kicker…this spider doesn’t like to bite my husband, oh no….only me. What the hell is up with that?!?!?! My husband thought I was crazy at first. He was like,”It’s just mosquito bites”. And I was like, “Oh no. I do not react with huge itchy bumps when it’s a mosquito bite”.

I have bites on my hip, my ass, my bikini line, and now my arm. Luckily, this spider has spared my face, but I’m sure that is next on his/her list. What am I to do???? Seriously, tell me. I’m totally open to suggestions, so if anyone is reading this and has any ideas, let me know. I mean, this is insane. We even checked the bed for bed bugs, but no sign of those and I’m pretty sure bed bugs would get any and all people in the bed. I’m not sure why this spider only has a taste for me, but I am done. This.is.war.

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When you realize you suck at coloring

So I’m not even going to talk about how long it’s been since I’ve blogged. I mean, there is really no point. Let’s just start this thing all over again…

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Recently (aka the last 6months…maybe more) I’ve been battling with insomnia. Stress related? Maybe. Although, I just stay home with The Boy and teach cycling classes, so it’s not like I can really complain that much. I mean, yeah, I have stress, but not enough that it should keep me tossing and turning night after night.

I’ve tried meditation, pills, no pills, natural supplements, tea, essential oils, breathing in certain ways….basically nothing has really helped, so I keep taking the pills and using my under-eye coverup. Basically, I am open to any suggestions, so when I saw some people posting about their adult coloring books, I was like, “Ooooh yeah, I totally need to try adult coloring”. In case you didn’t know…Adult coloring. It’s all the rage.

So, I did what any sleep deprived person would do. I went to Amazon ordered an adult coloring book. And 50 colored pencils. And I convinced myself that THIS was going to relax me. I waited my two days (Prime shipping…hello!) and then I was off. I had my adult coloring book (why does that sound dirty?), my 50 colored pencils, my pencil sharpener, and my creative spirit. I was ready.

Then, I started coloring….

To be honest, sometimes just choosing the colors stresses me out. Then, as I color, I’m like, “This looks like shit.” I mean, sure, I can color in the lines (depending on my wine consumption), but some people have some pretty amazing coloring pages happening out there in FaceBook-land. Mine don’t stack up. Before you start, I know I shouldn’t compare myself to others and yada-yada-yada, but I’m a perfectionist and that’s what I do. Compare and doubt. It’s a horrible cycle. Also, my hands start to hurt. I’m trying to be all creative and shade and artsy-fartsy stuff like that, and I have to take a break every 30 seconds because my hand starts cramping. I definitely need to buy one of those grippy things that go around your pencil. I went to Target to try and find one, but alas, I think they went out of stock in 1998. Woe is me.

Has the coloring helped with my stress? I don’t know. I only do it every few days or so. After about a month and half I have one completed page. ONE PAGE. These things are intricate though, so hold back that judgy face that you are making behind your computer screen.

Will I keep doing it? Sure. I just bought a new book last week. Maybe by the time I’m 84, I’ll be able to start that one.

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Just livin’ and not bloggin’

So, I’m totally weak and lame. I have been coming up with some pretty amazing playlists lately, but alas, I have not shared them with you all. Weak. Lame.

With all this non-posting, you would think my life is uber glamorous or something. It’s not. Most days I’m covered in baby drool and trying to mask my under-eye circles while searching for new music during the ten minutes that Baby Man is napping. Here is what has been going on lately. Some pretty great stuff:

  1. It’s happening! A real cycling studio is opening in Knoxville and I’m going to be one of the instructors. I’m really excited and training is this week. Whoop, whoop!
  2. In post-pregnancy news…I tried on a few pairs of pants and they actually fit! Well, the fit well enough to pass. I don’t think I’ll be splitting any seams. It only took 9 months. Jeez. Maybe at 12 months everything will actually fit.
  3. White Christmas Cookies have arrived! Wee!!!!! My Oma makes these and sends them to me every year. Imagine almond cookie powdered sugar goodness melting in your mouth. Yum.
  4. Since the cookies are here, it means it’s time for Christmas movie watching– so far, we’ve crossed National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation and Scrooged off the list. Elf is in the very near future.
  5. Making new recipes for Baby Man in hopes he will opt for putting them in his mouth over throwing them on the floor.
  6. Wrapping presents. So. Much. Wrapping. Thank goodness for Target and cute wrapping paper. Now if only I could get my bootay to the post office.
  7. Christmas card sending out. I’m lucky that I didn’t die like George Costanza’s fiance in Seinfield. I think I licked roughly 75 envelopes.
  8. Avoiding death by tupperware. Yeah, I’m lucky I haven’t tripped, fallen, broken a hip, and gotten pneumonia from all the tupperware that Baby Man likes to disperse throughout the house. It’s a miracle I’m still here.
  9. Actively trying to win Starbucks for Life.

Welp, that’s about the long and the short of it. I swear, I’ll post some full playlists soon, but in the meantime…shake your groove thing to some Goldfrapp. No…it’s not a Starbucks drink.

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Crying?!?! There’s no crying in spinning!

OMG. We have entered a new phase with the Tiny Man. Well, a couple phases…

The first is the “sticking everything in his mouth” phase. Seriously, it’s amazing what they can find on the floor. I mean, I Swiffer our floors every other day and have just mandated a clean the kitchen floor ever day rule and he is still picking up God-knows-what and sticking it in his mouth. We are lucky he hasn’t killed himself yet.

The second phase is the “cry at the top of my lungs for any reason” phase. He is happy one minute, screeching the next. And I wonder why I have a headache nearly every single day. Still, I tell myself, it may be allergies. It most definitely is allergies if I am allergic to babies. Wouldn’t that be something? Don’t fret. I just had my allergies tested and alas, I am not allergic to babies. Seriously though, he goes 0 to 60 is .1567 seconds. It’s unreal.

He cries/screams when you take something away from him, when you are eating and won’t give him a bite, when you walk away from him, when you pick him up, when you put him down, when he’s done/doesn’t want to get out of the bath, when you put him down for a nap, when you pick him up from a nap, when you put on his clothes, take off his clothes, change his diaper… I think you get my point. It’s exhausting. I’m told this phase is going to last a couple years, so I guess I better buckle up and stop complaining. It’s really not that bad most of the time. He is such a good baby that it really is just a pain in the buttox when he decides to turn his enchanting two tooth grin in to an open mouth wail. The good thing is that although the crying happens pretty much every day, it’s spurts of crying that really don’t last that long…depending on how fast you can change a diaper or change him.

Luckily, I do have an escape from the crying. Spin class. Oh, glorious spin class. How I love thee, let me count the ways….

  1. Babies aren’t allowed in class.

Good list right?!?!

Sometime the screaming babe does accompany me to the gym where he happily plays at the daycare until he hears my voice in the hall. Then BABY WANT TO GO HOOOOMEEEEEEE! Yeah, that’s what I envision him saying when I hear his cries from afar.

Let’s go back to that dark spin room with awesome beats and the only crying going on is….well, there is none. Ok, maybe a little when I tell the class we are doing tabatas. Muah ha ha. If sweat is fat crying, then that is allowed in the room too.

Now for a few of my favorite songs that I’ve been using lately. So good, they will make you cry. Well, probably not, but they may get you up and moving!

This first one is a find by the hubs. I thought the “ooohs” in it sounded familiar and that is because it has been sampled in that “Barbra Streisand” song by Duck Sauce. If you watch Glee, you’ve heard it. Yes, I watch(ed) Glee. I’m not ashamed. Well, ok, I kind of am.

I’m not sure where I first found these, maybe on FaceBook? I don’t know, but I love them.

First heard Riptide on The Voice. It’s funny when I’m running to grab my phone to Shazam songs…at home, at the mall, in the grocery store. Yeah, I’m a nerd and I think I’m kind of in love with Vance Joy. Well, at least these two songs…

Finally, I absolutely LOVE this one by Bruno Mars & Mark Ronson. “Gotta kiss myself, so pretty!” Sidenote: just watched this video…kinda takes me back to the 90s.

 

 

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Spinning & Drinking & Eating

Is everyone ready for Thanksgiving???

I’m sure if you take spin/cycling classes, you’ll hear a lot of “work hard so you can eat more” or “we gotta burn off all that food we are going to eat”. Yeah…I don’t say those kinds of things. I don’t believe in the “you ate it, now negate it” motivation. Now exercising in order to drink a delicious libation….I’m all over that! If you need a Thanksgiving themed drink, try this Pumpkin Margarita. It is Mmm, Mmm good! I didn’t create the recipe, but I can’t find the link to it.

Ingredients
For Pumpkin Simple Syrup
1 can organic pumpkin puree (canned actually works better than fresh in this case)
1/2 cup organic brown sugar
1/4 cup organic sugar
1 cinnamon stick
2 cups water

For Margarita
1 1/2 oz organic tequila (try 4 Copas)
1/2 oz Cointreau
1 organic lime

For Garnish
1 tsp allspice
1 tsp salt
A pinch of nutmeg

Directions

  1. Make a pumpkin simple syrup by combining pumpkin puree with brown sugar, cinnamon stick, nutmeg, and water in a saucepan over low heat.
  2. Stir constantly for 20 to 30 minutes, until cinnamon flavor is present and mixture is smooth. Remove from heat and cool. The Simple syrup should have the consistency of a thin smoothie.
  3. Pass the thick syrup through a fine mesh sieve (or a strainer), using the back of a spoon and discard the pumpkin pulp.
  4. Prep margarita glasses by combining sugar, allspice, and salt and pouring the mixture onto a small plate. Run a wedge of lime around the rim of each margarita glass, and then dip the glass rim into spiced sugar.
  5. For each margarita, combine the juice of half a lime, tequila, Cointreau, and 2 oz pumpkin simple syrup. Shake well and serve on the rocks. Enjoy!

 

I was planning on reviving an old Thanksgiving playlist or creating a new one, but time got the best of me and I figured since my classes are Monday & Tuesday this week, there was no need to theme it up.

You guys know how I love a theme though. Saturday’s class theme was “One Hit Wonders” and it was cheezy, and fun, and all kinds of wonderful. All kinds of wonderful filled with sweat. Appetizing.

Here is the playlist! Full of some amazing 80’s and 90’s “classics”.

As always, I had a couple remixes in there. I put the original’s in the Spotify list for you since the remixes don’t show up. Here they are, if you are interested.

So that’s all from this neck of the woods. Just spinning, eating, and drinking in store! I hope you all have a great Thanksgiving if you are celebrating!

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Totally off topic…

Just as I was about to start writing this post, my husband g-chatted me a link to read. A link that after reading, I can no longer muster the energy to write because I have used all that energy up laughing. A link that I hope you go to and find just as amusing as I did.

If you’ve ever had an MRI, you will relate in some way. If you are like me and get claustrophobic, you will relate even more. If you tend to embarrass yourself in situations, well….we probably need to meet for coffee and talk about all of our embarrassing stories.

Dad (I know you’re reading), I can’t believe this didn’t happen to you during your MRI.

Warning: If you don’t find farting funny or amusing, we can’t be friends and you shouldn’t click on the link. You’ve been warned. Click here if you do find that sort of thing amusing.

P.S. Speaking of embarrassing…I don’t even want to tell you how many remixes/mashup’s of “Shake it Off” I’ve downloaded. It’s not ok. I need help. Pretty sure I’m using this one in class tomorrow…

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Spooky scary spin

Boo!

Did I scare you?

No.

Okay then. I’ll try harder next time.

Welp, it’s almost Halloween time. Do you have your costumes ready? We do! We are having a little Halloween shindig at our place on Saturday and our first Halloween costume (the one that required me to sew a new zipper) is pretty much ready to go. It’s a secret, so I can’t tell you what we are going as. Ah, the suspense!!!

I was so excited that I got to teach a Halloween class this year! Yesterday, I subbed for the official Y Halloween class. The class was bummed the regular instructor wasn’t there (they were excited for her costume), but they put up with me and my antics. I did dress up a bit. 80’s spinning instructor, anyone??? Let me tell you, wearing leggings during class get HOT, but I’ll take any chance I can get to wear my highlighter yellow leggings.

The class went well, although when I asked them “Who you gonna call”, they did not want to yell “Ghostbusters”. I mean….c’mon. I rarely ask for class participation, but how can you resist yelling out Ghostbusters??? Thunder stealers. Oh well, some classes are vocal and some are not. The class was fun, but it was hard work too. The perfect combo!

I did use some of the songs that I posted as ideas last year. I also had some music on before class started…Time Warp, MC Hammer’s Addams Family, and Hungry Like the Wolf. I’ve got some ideas for next year too! So what did the final playlist look like? Here you go….

Yes, Werewolf Barmitzvah made the cut! I think that song is hilarious. Not sure anyone else got it or recognized it, but oh well, we were stretching anyways.

I got super sweaty during this class (both times- I taught it last night and this morning…mama’s legs are tired). It was a good mix of intervals and hills. Bad Moon Rising was our little break halfway through class. It was really fun to put together this playlist. Some honorable mentions that will probably be on the playlist next year will be:

  • Long Road to Hell by Avicii
  • Howlin’ for You by The Black Keys
  • Last Night Daft Punk Saved my Life by Scott Melker

What do you guys think? What would you have put on your Halloween playlist?

I hope everyone has an awesome Halloween! Stay safe and warm! Especially if you live in Tennessee– they are forecasting snow for Saturday. Craaaazy!

 

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